ALERT: Talk contains graphic sexual language
At TED2009, audience member Cindy Gallop gave a 4-minute presentation that became one of the event’s most talked about. Speaking from her personal experience, she argued that hardcore pornography had distorted the way a generation of young men think about sex, and talked about how she was fighting back with the launch of a website to correct the myths being propagated. Later, she expanded her brief presentation into a provocative and thought-provoking TED Book.
Her talk’s graphic content means we can’t include it in the main run of full TEDTalks, which go by default to subscribers, including children. But we do think it’s worth posting here. Cindy is no prude, and not everyone will enjoy the graphic language on her website, MakeLoveNotPorn.com. But she has courageously (and wittily) raised an important issue, which we think deserves wider attention. Constructive comments welcome!
Tweet this talk: http://on.ted.com/206I
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Giovanni Pisano commented on Dec 7 2011
with subtitles of course
Giovanni Pisano commented on Dec 7 2011
I would like to translate this video in my native language, Italian, can anybody tell me how to do it?
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J Mill commented on Nov 1 2011
Good talk!
I have talked about this with my young daughter at length. I call it ‘performance sex’ vs ‘relationship sex’ though I make it clear that ‘relationship sex’ doesn’t have to happen in the context of a ‘relationship’ as we think of it.
What I have always worried about is how internet porn is literally changing the brains of the young men who watch it. As they develop their tastes at a young age, what they find sexy online may well be what they (and we) have to live with for the rest of their lives. What they are doing is setting themselves (and the poor partners who have to have sex with them) into a rut that they may very well not want to be in. Sadly, they have no clue that they are doing this as they whack off to very specific acts or looks. I don’t think it’s as easy as Cindy suggests – that they can easily be educated to the reality that “not all women like…” Human sexuality is not that simple.
On the other side, I fear for my daughter’s sexual pleasure and enjoyment. I think it is less likely she will enjoy what she is going to get in a partner than I did some 30 years ago starting out.
Several things I have told her since she was very young. 1) If you can’t talk about it, don’t do it. Especially don’t do it to please someone else. Period. 2)If you haven’t figured out how to give yourself pleasure, you’re not ready to have someone else do it for you.
I figure those two things cover a lot of bases in this area.
It does piss me off that in this day and age, girls (partners of these boys mostly) are getting to relax and enjoy sex less as the creative and fun adventure that it is. It seems they are often being asked to ‘perform’ to some online standard for some immature male who thinks he understands sexuality.
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Ruby Ryder commented on Oct 4 2011
@anna steele -
Really? You’re going to make the majority of your comment about her boots? This is earth calling – you are off topic.
anna steele commented on Oct 4 2011
I love all of what she articulates as it is so real and yet why is she wearing those awful boots? does wearing clothes that damage the spine and disorientate your center really integrate with her words? walk your talk? well dear if you walk in those boots its clear to me you still have some issues of your own in which you feel objects that give away your stability and center are still needed. This is earth calling.
connor edington commented on Nov 3 2011
Troll
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David Barnett commented on Sep 14 2011
I agreed with every word…so I tried to access her webpage, but couldn’t as the filter classified it as Pornography. Go figure
David Barnett commented on Sep 14 2011
I agreed with every word…so I tried to access her webpage, but couldn’t as the filter classified it as Pornography. Go figure.